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Remember the old sex dolls? They were pretty much a balloon with a Halloween mask glued to the head. It is amazing they sold at all but they sold millions across the globe. They were and are still very cheap and still sell. Kinda makes you wonder who is buying them, doesn’t it? It is hard to imagine them not popping after the first sexual encounter so maybe people aren’t actually buying them for sex but as props.

HOV lanes suck unless you have a passenger. People have actually gotten tickets for trying to use a sex doll in the HOV lanes. Bet the ranch that a lot more got away with it and likely still do. How about colleges? It’s reasonable to assume that every college has at least one somewhere in their dorms and probably a couple of more than that. Harley riders seem to like having them as passengers on occasion. At resorts, they always seem to find their way to the pool. Surely there are also lonely guys and gals who have one all dressed up and propped up in a chair at the kitchen table. Perhaps the vast majority of these Halloween masked balloons aren’t used for sex at all.

Today’s sex dolls are much more realistic than the balloon mask dolls. Some are a mixture of some rubber substance and balloon (cause they are cheaper) and some are solid some rubber substance. Some of the modern sex dolls weight almost as much as a real girl/guy so they are substantial and appear to be long-lasting. They can even wear real peoples clothes. The real breakthrough on these dolls is in facial features. Some of these dolls have very realistic looking faces and in the HOV lane the likelihood of getting caught is close to zero (just don’t break any other laws or you’re screwed).

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If you live alone having a sex doll sitting in a chair in the living room might be just what you need to feel just a little less lonely. You talk to your dog or cat and they aren’t talking back to you so why not talk to your realistic looking sex doll. Or tie it to a St. Andrews cross and whip it every day when you get home from work (you’ll need a spare room for this with a lockable door) and whip it while you think of your ex or that creep at work.

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And let’s not forget that your sex doll has no sexual limits if you want to go there.

But, but aren’t they like 10 thousand dollars? Yeah, the really really good ones are and if you’re gonna pay 10K for a doll you’d better be screwing it. You can find reasonably priced ones (there’s a lot of material in these things) anywhere from $1,200 if you’re patient, wait for sales and do your research, to about $5,000 depending on your budget. You’ve wasted more money on crap you don’t use or that you’ve peed out. The point is, for $1,200 the price isn’t exactly out of reach for most people in Trump’s economy.

So if you just want to use it as a prop, company you can tolerate, or bang away to your hearts content a sex doll can be for anyone (unless you have kids then it’s bad).

And for anyone who makes these things if you send me a free one I’ll write you a review. 😉

The opinions expressed in this commentary are solely those of the author and are not not necessarily either shared or endorsed by iPatriot.com.

Patrick McCarthy

Retired RCR (registered commodities representative). Conservative. Editor of The Trump News Network

 

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