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This article is the satirical section of a truncated article about perceptions of North Korea, and both are an extension of Learning HOW to read : Media Triggers which was about identifying and avoiding ‘word triggers’ used by media and butt-orifices to manipulate your emotions and opinions. (If you go to the full article, don’t forget to read the caption on the photo.)

Today I am going to make some statements about the USA as might be found in the newspaper of a mythical communist country called, ‘The Democratic Marxist Republic of Californication.’ In doing so, I am going to be making statements that a casual world news observer or internet savvy foreigner might actually consider to be factual based on extensive exposure to western media.

Will the USA become a Rogue State?

Much has happened to that once great and free nation of the United States of America over the last six decades since its defeat at the hands of the Chinese, North Koreans, Cubans and Vietnamese. The once great Republic has been taken over by dictators who have imposed their political will on the poor and oppressed the peoples of the USA.

It has been at various times reported in many newspapers around that world that the USA is now so weak that it has become dependent on both Russia and China for its very survival. Several investigative newspaper reports indicate that the current president Ronald Rump is in constant contact with and submits all of his ideas to Russian President Rasputin prior to taking any governmental action, and that the Russian President is able to blackmail and otherwise manipulate not just the Congress of the USA but the citizens as well via their voting processes.

It is also well documented that the USA is deeply in debt to China to the tune of around three trillion dollars. That once great and wealthy nation has been bled dry for decades by its corrupt ruling elite so that today it is estimated to be in debt to the tune of 20 trillion dollars.

Crime, from all reports, is at an all-time high, with murders, thefts, carjackings and rapes occurring every day all over the country. Government special police roam the country at large arresting whomsoever they wish, deporting from the country anyone who has committed even some minor infraction of the law.

Whilst not yet definitively proven, it has been reported by many people that special government agents have been the instigators of many terrorist activities, all of which are designed to coerce the citizenry into giving up their constitutional freedoms in return for personal security. Such terrorism is of course blamed on foreign governments, including our own.

America’s Northern neighbor, The Republic of Canadia has all but ended political ties with the USA whilst at the same time offering all US citizens a welcoming escape route to a new and better life. America’s fear of our great republic and that of Mexico is such that President Rump has ordered a wall to be built along our borders to protect and defend Americans. They are indeed paranoid about being invaded. In the meantime however this debt ridden country has begun printing huge amounts of money to build up its military strength and we fear that we may soon be facing an armed and belligerent USA.

It has also been reported that educational facilities in America are currently being purged of all teachers who do not toe the political line of the government and begin actively propagandizing the children. Although at one time the people of the United States followed their traditional religions, according to many sources, educational authorities are now attempting to brainwash American children into adopting a foreign religion, one more preferred by the establishment.

It is well recorded that not only the current president but all of those preceding him regularly issued executive orders to subjugate the will of the people to the ideological position of the government.

According to many different reports coming out of the country, there is even a push to force women everywhere to cover their faces and their heads. How is this freedom? And as if this is not enough, numerous reports suggest that there is a big push to force women to have babies. There are also reports that the government is preparing laws to prevent homosexuals from using public restrooms.

We do not know what the future holds for this once great nation, but what is known is that it has become paranoid and dictatorial and as has been proven, their farcical democratic elections are rigged to maintain the status quo.

Will America become a rogue state? Will it bring about a new world war? Only time will tell. In the meantime however, we advise all of our citizens to stay clear of the country and to report any person whom they suspect of being a sympathizer or spy for this rogue state.

If you wish to support the oppressed people of the USA, we recommend that you donate to the Clinthill Foundation which is heavily invested in ousting the American government and replacing it with a truly democratic government focused on returning power to the people.

U.N. Owen and J.J. Walsh contributed to the research for this article.

iPatriot Contributers

 

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